♚The final task

Τετάρτη, 6 Ιανουαρίου 2010
Defenseless I fall on my knees..fighting so hard to defy gravity that keeps pulling me down with all its strength; trying to weaken me till I drop; till I meet the floor..
It's funny how someone can so easily beat gravity or be beaten by it in a heartbeat.

So many mistakes..emotions that block my logic, thoughts that devour my every living moment and a pain so deep that paralyzes my every move. And all this..keeping me locked in a place filled with an overwhelming sense of dread or impending doom and horror, making my heart pound so fast.

2)The beginning:
My mind is on overdrive..and I suddenly start feeling disconnected from my body; time passes so fast yet I am standing still, feeling unstable in a yet stable environment.
Trying to snap out of it you start to move..scratching the walls around you; and that's when you meet nausea , chest pain , dizziness , uncontrollable trembling , rapid breathing and a tingling sensation of the arms, hands, fingertips, feet and face.

Trying to survive it you close your eyes and silence is your only companion through this..
Hearing voices and questions that you just can't answer; your voice is stolen; feeling helpless , chocking on your own saliva you try to stay awake just to face an upcoming paranoia.

4)Living/facing it:
Self control is lost. Muscle aches and pains. Facing the fear of death for no one knows how long..

5)The end:
You suddenly feel a giant hand piercing your chest, reaping out those feelings one by one till all is left is exhaustion and weakness..
You open your eyes facing a blurred vision that proves you are still alive; you are still there;
Trying to figure out if yourself and your soul are intact you face the fact that one tiny part is destroyed.

Is it worth it? Even if I keep surviving these attacks will I lose all thats left of me eventually?

I'm a survivor of my own tests.My final task is here though..finally.
I will put an end to everything. I will decide, I will face, I will end, I will start, I will change, I will forget, I will cry, I will fight my inner demons and I will claim back my peace of mind.
By the end of this week I will have either revived my lost life or died to resurrect and face a new beginning.


1 σχόλια:

Skauld Skauksson είπε...

In any case I deem the outcome good... Do you?

Δημοσίευση σχολίου